Often parents remark that days are long but years are short. Regrettably, this is so true functionally. In the midst of a particular day with the noises, stresses, pressures, messes, fights, squabbles, arguments, meals, dirty laundry, and general lack of wisdom, parenting overwhelms even the most robust of parents. Yet, in what seems to be just minutes, an entire year flies by and time fleets away.
In the process, if a parent fails to maintain perspective, the days move from cherished to dreaded. Children as gracious gifts from God (Ps 127:3-5) become a pain. Those needing the parents’ love most often get the parents’ anger instead.
Take just a few moments to remind yourself why it is essential to keep perspective. Why must we as parents cherish every day? The following statement by a family in Indiana who lost all three of their children in October helps put it all in perspective.
Background Story
On October 30, 2018, Alyssa L. Shepherd, 24, of Rochester, Indiana, passed a school bus which had stopped to pick up children at a bus stop. Failing to observe the flashing lights and the extended stop arm, she ran over four children, three of whom were an older sister and her two brothers. All three died on the scene.
The Family Statement
The parents of the three children issued a statement on December 9, 2018. The statement, from Brittany Stahl and Shane Ingle, is as follows:
“We are honored for everyone all over the world who took the time to share their love, support and prayers. A parent never expects to bury their child. The heartache consumes you and not just one child but three children at the same time. Our loss is more then what we can even express in words.
Alivia Faith Stahl was looking forward to turning 10 years old on Dec. 22. Her first double-digit birthday she was looking forward to eating tons of rainbow poop emoji cupcakes with family, friends and classmates. Our daughter was such a beautiful soul. So caring and compassionate. Her passion was to help and bring joy to others. She was such a “Mother Hen” especially to her adorable twin brothers Mason Thomas and Xzavier Patrick Ingle.
Mason was such a mommy’s boy. His personality was so shy and caring and his hugs could melt anyone’s heart. Mason had a love for life and was an inquisitive child, wanting to learn everything about the world around him.
Xzavier was such a daddy’s boy his personality was one of a kind. He brought so much laughter with his comical sense of humor. He was adventurous and loved the outdoors.
All three of their smiles were contagious to everyone around them. We always enjoyed our family time together at home or away from home. Our dining room table will forever hold memories that brought us together every night as a family. Every night we go to sleep without their hugs and kisses. And every morning we wake up to reality and wishing it was just a dream. We miss them so much. Our lives are forever changed. Not only did our three children die that day but a big part of us died with them.
Christmas and Alivia’s birthday approaching our lives are filled with so much pain and emptiness. Alivia Faith Stahl, Mason Thomas Ingle and Xzavier Patrick Ingle we will do everything in our power to keep your memories alive, they will never be forgotten.
Thank you to everyone who has been respecting our privacy in this time of grief. God bless each and every one of you.”
This Serves as a Reminder to All of Us
None of us know how long God will allow us to borrow our children. As a loan from God, we do not know if we will have them a very short while or a full life. As a parent whose child has died, I wish I could go back and rewrite some of those short days to put work on hold, pay more attention, take more pictures, and enjoy a few extra minutes.
In life, there are many things that vie for our attention. Today, do what you must do for the glory of God, but also remember, your child or children are a temporary gift from God. Today, everyone of our children need our love, mercy, compassion, and kindness as we seek to live out the gospel with them. Today, your children need you to maintain perspective so that they can experience Jesus’ love through you. In the process, you will experience Jesus’ love through them. When this long day is over and the short year passes, you will be thankful for every day you honored Christ by being present in your children’s lives.
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