By Bill Piatt and Kevin Carson
Editor’s Note: My dear friend and ministry partner Bill Piatt recently worked through some of Jay Adams’ ideas from More than Redemption related to how Adams views man. Yesterday, we identified what Adams said about man. In today’s blog, we provide very practical expressions for daily living and practice.
Yesterday we considered Jay Adams’ view of man as a moral being, a social being, and a working being. We suggested that for these reasons the COVID-19 shutdown and slow recovery program has produced a tough environment for both various kinds of workers and students.
What a great opportunity to learn self-discipline skills! Of course, the truth that God uses such frustrations as opportunities for all of us to grow in His likeness still holds true. Although, seeing this as part of God’s grace will be difficult for many people when there seems to be nothing good coming out of it. This produces yet another level of struggle.
Today, we present some practical suggestions for working through these struggles. As you will notice, as consistent with Jay Adams’ view discussed yesterday, they focus quite a bit on a person’s behavior and thinking. It is important, therefore, in addition to these thoughts, all of us must remember our purpose of life and the absolute necessity of intentionally pursuing Christ through knowing Him through His Word (worshipping Him/treasuring Him). In other words, we must remember how God uses pressured situations to grow us as we seek to become more like Christ while understanding the implications of the Gospel.
To only change our behavior and/or our thinking without also focusing on the heart, the changes will only serve to soothe superficially. However, we also realize there is a blessing in both “knowing” and “doing” (John 13:17). We must get busy doing what is right and good as we develop our awareness of Who God is and the implications of that in living as a worshiper.We realize there is a blessing in both “knowing” and “doing” (John 13:17). We must get busy doing what is right and good as we develop our awareness of Who God is and the implications of that in living as a worshiper. Share on X
Application Related to COVID-19
As discussed yesterday, consider the person who is accustomed to having a very specific work structure and now is without that particular structure. He/she is left to be productive in creative ways, but is still a social being as well as a working being. He/she is not around the usual co-workers who have become more a part of the person’s world than most recognize. Because of this, we as counselors and friends may also need to help some find creative ways to develop skills at the self-discipline that will encourage a work ethic that goes beyond waiting to have instructions given or tasks assigned. Can we help them assign tasks for themselves that will be productive?
Specific Ideas to Help Connect Practical Ways for Daily Living
For Those with Too Much Extra Time
For those with too much extra time on their hands, we may need to help them think through some wise ways to use their time. One consideration would be to help them develop a list of options. Here is the start of a creative germ list for those out of work with too much time on their hands:
- Clean out the garage
- Organize the garage
- Sort and clean tools (organize those socket that have been dumped into the toolbox, etc.)
- Clean behind and inside the dryer including the vent to the outside of the house or apartment
- Clean behind the washer
- While you are at it … how about behind the refrigerator (and that dust that collects around bottom of the frig) … and the stove.
- Yard work including extra trimming, planting, cultivating, repotting, landscaping, etc.
- Cleaning your office, organizing books, paperwork, etc.
- Cleaning your craft area, organizing craft materials, etc.
- Cleaning your room, including behind and under the dressers, organizing and sorting clothes in the drawers. It might be time to get rid of unneeded clothing items and at the same time be a blessing to someone else.
- Clean the closets, organizing and sorting, etc. Again, might be time to get rid of unnecessary items especially those clothes you haven’t worn in the past couple years.
- Clean behind the TV, desktop computer, around all those wires that look like a “rat’s nest” under your desk or entertainment center.
- Are there repairs that could be done to the house/apartment? Money may be a factor but try to be creative.
- Read a good book … read THE GOOD BOOK.
- Set a personal goal of exercise when your physical activity is limited due to the stay at home order. If you don’t have a step counter and your phone doesn’t have the app, then be creative … count your steps as you walk around the block or yard a few times. I don’t always get my target number of steps in a day but it gives me a little nudge each day to “do something physical.”
- Exercise, run, aerobics, jog, walk with a goal in mind.
- Challenge a friend via social media, encourage someone by phone, reach out to just talk with a friend – focus on Christ (check out this link for a way to begin this conversation)
For Those Who Miss the Social Interaction with Others
The difficulty of being around people for several hours each day and then the restriction of being confined to family may also present some challenges. It is a great opportunity to build (or rebuild) relationships within the family. Working together with family can be a great relationship builder, plus we are often more productive as a team. These are great opportunities to work on communication skills in living out the love of Christ to family. Would it help to suggest ways to interact as a family? Or perhaps even ways to be socially interactive without violating social distancing?
- Family game time, board games (or as one family member called them “bored games”), activities outside such as creative versions of baseball, kickball, croquet, soccer, football, golf, tennis, catch, Frisbee, horseshoe, corn toss, hopscotch, sidewalk art, inside arts and crafts, story time, I spy with my little eye, who can find the most varieties of birds, dandelion picking (the neighbors will love you), etc.
- Build something together such as a bird house, play house, string house (doesn’t cost anything but a ball of string and a few sticks from the yard), teach the children about bike maintenance (you do oil the chain and bearings, don’t you?), wash the car together, etc.
- Take time while you have time to communicate with family. Show interest. Ask good questions that draw family members out. Do not interrogate but be creative.
- Questions to know the person (like a child): What did you like most about school? What do you miss the most? What is your favorite subject? Favorite sport? Favorite color? Food? Dessert? Person? Event? … and why … etc.
- Questions that reach closer to the heart: What makes you happy? If you could change your world right now, would you change it and how would you change it? What makes you the saddest? What do you look forward to? Etc.
For Those Especially Troubled with Specific Temptations
Our hearts are prone to wander and pressures in life reveal our treasures, values, functional beliefs. As Calvin suggested, “Our hearts are factories of idols.” Given this reality it is no wonder that people are struggling with the present restrictions. The answer, of course, is to pursue Christ first and foremost. So our idols of the heart will evidence themselves during such times as these.
- Consider the person who is struggling with sexual temptation and/or pornography, added structure at home may be needed, accountability, radical amputation, and a good workable “battle plan.” My observation is that many times it appears that people who are under pressure, bored, stressed, or fatigued often look for “bright spots” for relief (false saviors). Porn can be one of those pits as well as drugs, escapism, etc. The long-term solution is of course to learn new ways to deal with pressured situations, seeing God’s purpose for our lives and pursuing Him, as well, putting off the sinful habits. Perhaps not sleeping, staying up after a spouse goes to bed, long hours in a separate room closed off from the usual co-workers and now even family, these can give opportunity for greater struggle in this area.
- Consider the person who struggles with “fear of man” who hold the opinion of others as most important. Fear of man takes various shapes and looks.
- Although some might never admit this, they “long for” and constantly seek after the approval of those around them whom they consider significant. Can we imagine their struggle to find others around them when limited to immediate contact with family members only? Will they be driven to be more social media active and be even more concerned when others via social media slight, ignore, or fail to complement them or in other ways approve, affirm them? If the person has a strong desire to be treasured by others, how will that play out in social media or in a family dynamic?
- Some may enjoy not being around other people because of pride and the fear that others do not see them as important. They may indeed become more self-focused as they become more isolated. This encourages a tightening spiral downward in emotions and/or depression.
- Consider some who particularly struggle with pride (don’t we all to some degree?). Isolation may encourage them to fail to push themselves out of their comfort zone in loving others. They must be encouraged to continue to find creative ways to love others around them while practicing appropriate safety. Perhaps lists such as ways to love others may help: letter writing (a lost art), phone text messages, email messages, ecards, phone calls, neighbor chats over the fence or porch, checking in on neighbors, checking in on life group members, checking in on elderly in our church, creative loving deeds for others. All these can help encourage one’s mind to be intentional about loving others through the creativity, planning, execution of the deed.
- What about the person who recognizes an ongoing level of anxiety?
- We recognize some level of concern is actually good and healthy. When does healthy concern move over into sinful worry? We want to encourage them to understand this good distinction between the two.
- Limit mainstream media coverage .. limit news broadcasts. The mainstream media presents bold headline wordings that are meant to capture attention and are often embellished to grab attention. Most news media want to be the number one program and so reporting is often bold, worded purposefully to excite and arouse, and repeated over and over again. It is probably best for most to limit their time watching and listening to the news coverage of this pandemic. The various news conferences give helpful information without depending upon the media such as the President and the White House task force, state governors, and local government officials. It is good to stay up with current events in our community and our country or world, but it can easily become an obsession. It’s like listening to The Weather Channel, yes, it is intriguing in some respects, but one can sit and watch the same information recycled several times in a rather short period of time and learn absolutely nothing different than was learned in the first five minutes.
- Use uncertainty or anxiety to trigger an action plan to thank God for Who He is and His blessings rather than fear of the future or present. Of course be wise and plan, but don’t worry … balance should be practiced during our present events.
Bill is a follower of Jesus Christ, a husband to Mary Ann, a father to two adult children, a granddad to six, and great granddad to eleven. He worships and serves as the director of biblical counseling at Sonrise Baptist Church in Ozark, MO, is an adjunct faculty member at Baptist Bible College and Theological Seminary in Springfield, MO, and is a church planter. Bill also serves as an ACBC Fellow, is IABC certified, leads a biblical counseling training center, and regularly counsels. Over the years, he has served as a counselor for many pastors, missionaries, their families, and other Christian workers.
I am grateful he is my brother, friend, and colleague.
KevinCarson.com | Wisdom for Life in Christ Together