By Howard Eyrich
Editor’s Note: Today Dr. Howard Eyrich helps parents consider how to take advantage of the current events to help teach and serve your children. You’ll enjoy this short blog and his ministry of encouragement to you today.
Our current events are presenting unique opportunities for parenting. Many images seen are disturbing. If children are not asking questions, parents should be raising them. What is racism? What does the Bible say about social justice? What is the Christian’s responsibility to government? If protesting is constitutional, why do protests turn into riots?
What is a parent to do?
Listen
There are three people to whom a parent needs listen. First, the Lord through His word. Second is your spouse, partner in this enterprise (allowances for single parent). This is necessary to assure being on the same page. Third, is your child. Some will disagree claiming this is opens the door for manipulation. I disagree because listening is the window to the heart and fosters confidence.
Question
Questioning is a form of listening. It is a means of clarifying and discerning thinking, attitudes, and reasons for resistance (or anger, shock, etc.). Seven years of youth ministry as well as being a parent confirmed this strategy repeatedly. A frequent complaint of teens in counseling is that “no one ever questions why I think what I do?’ Listening and questioning honors the image of God in your child.
Self-control
Self-control is essential. By it we restrain harsh and irrational responses to cultural happenings. By it we restrain yelling and unreasonable discipline or restrictions out of fear. It prompts us to invite our children to consider the Word of God with us to process public attitudes.
Instruct
The goal of parenting is to raise the next generation of godly competent believers to populate the body of Christ. We do that by raising them in the nature and admonition of the Lord. The Apostle Paul gives us a great model with Timothy. He had Timothy travel with him. On that journey he was taught doctrine, observed persecution, and watched how Paul processed it. We can be sure there were many “father-son” discussions. We can assume that Timothy ministered under Paul’s oversight. Next, Paul sent him out on his own to Ephesus (I Timothy 1:3) to do what had been modeled and been taught.
As Christians we are about teaching doctrine from little on up. Age appropriately we should be relating doctrine to life. The horrific we are now living through is providing opportunity both to instruct and age appropriately teach how to process events by identifying biblical values and their application in real life.
Give thanks
Paul teaches us to give thanks in all things for this is the will of God (I Thess. 5:18). We need to lead our children in giving thanks for the Word which gives us wisdom for such a time as this. We need to walk them through the Beatitudes and the various one another passages. We need to teach them to give thanks for both the promise and the assurance of the return of Jesus. The latter extended Paul’s hope to the Thessalonians in perilous times (I Thessalonians 4:12-14).
About the Author:
Dr. Howard is married to Pam, has two adult children, and eight grandchildren. He currently teaches, is an elder, and serves as a board member of the International Association of Biblical Counselors and a fellow in the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors. He has served multiple congregations as a church planter, senior pastor, and elder. He has authored multiple books and articles. Over the years, he served working on the staff of the Christian Counseling and Educational Foundation as Counselor and Director of Curriculum Development, the first Executive Director of then the National Association of Nouthetic Counselors (now ACBC), and has led multiple training programs in seminaries and churches. He currently serves as Director of the Doctor of Ministry Program in Biblical Counseling at Birmingham Theological Seminary.
In addition, God has allowed me to be his friend.
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