How do you pick the best gifts for everyone on your Christmas list?

Is there a great way to get just the perfect thing?

It can be stressful trying to pick out the best gifts. Sometimes I get other people’s opinions about what it the best gift to give a particular person. They usually answer me with questions! That’s not what I want. I want answers.

One friend gave me a whole list of answers. It was great. This person and I are different and provided great alternatives than the ones I was considering. I took the advice and it worked out great.

Thankfully, there are two helpful ways to provide you assistance in your gift-giving as well. In this blog today, the Book of Proverbs provides you aid in choosing the best gifts for everyone on your Christmas list. In the previous blog (here), we considered the character of God and looked at how He gives gifts. We ended with a series of questions that may be helpful for us as we pick gifts as well.

As I mentioned yesterday, before you skim the rest of the article looking for specific items to purchase, don’t be disappointed that there are no specific gifts mentioned. The idea is not to tell you what is a good or bad, right or wrong, perfect or imperfect gift. Instead, I will at least help get you on the path of wisdom as you seek to buy, make, or somehow provide the best gifts for those on your list — and we won’t even consider if the recipient has been good or bad this year (I often fail that one).

On to specific wisdom principles from Proverbs that will help us pick the best Christmas gifts for everyone on our list…

Principles for Wise Gift-Giving

Now, we’re ready to think about the gifts. The book of Proverbs contains wisdom, a lens through which you can consider the gifts you give.

The Gift Encourages Growth

Principle One: The gift encourages growth — including spiritual growth, wisdom, intellect, and emotion (Proverbs 1:2-9; 8:13; 9:10; 10:27; 11:16; 15:33; 16:6; 19:1, 23; 22:1; 25:28). Solomon’s concern was that his son would grow to have both the knowledge and skill necessary to live life pleasing God and being a benefit to others. The process of growth begins with wisdom. Essential to wisdom is knowing the fear of the Lord and learning to receive instruction. Therefore, it is helpful any­time you can give a gift that encourages growth. The question to ask is: How does this gift encourage the receiver to grow as a well-rounded, God-fearing person?

The Gift Exalts Godly Values

Principle Two: The gift exalts godly values (Proverbs 1:10-18; 2:11-15; 3:29-31; 4:14-18; 12:20-21; 13:11; 16:29; 24:17). Today it may be hard to find and enjoy entertainment that promotes godly values. However, Solomon want­ed his son to know the dangers of loving what is not God-honoring and neighbor-respecting. The question to ask is: Does this gift promote God, godliness, and love of neighbor? Or Does this gift exalt sin against others, blur lines of moral­ity, or glamorize unwise living?

The Gift Promotes Bible Memory and Application

Principle Three: The gift promotes Bible memory and application (Prov­erbs 3:1-8). Solomon understood that a long and full life was only possible if the child would not let mercy or truth forsake him. The way Solomon presents the concept is two-fold: the teachings are not only to become a lifestyle; they are to become the child’s very nature. The benefits of such living are that you learn to acknowledge God in daily liv­ing, and God makes your path straight. The question to ask then is: In what ways does this gift promote learning and applying God’s Word to life?

The Gift Engenders Time with Parents and Other Godly People

Principle Four: The gift engen­ders time with parents and other godly people (Proverbs 4:1-13; 19:20; 22:17-21; 23:12, 19). It is interesting that parents often complain about chil­dren who do not engage in conversation around the home; yet, the same parent will give a gift that discourages time spent together. The question to ask here is: Does this gift engender time with others (parents, grandparents, other godly influencers)? Or Does this gift take time, energy, and focus away from such interactions?

The Gift Reinforces Sexual Morality

Principle Five: The gift reinforces sexual morality (Proverbs 5:1-20; 6:20-35; 7:6-27). Solomon says that staying pure and not falling prey to the dripping lips of an adulterous woman is so important that the son should not even get on her sidewalk. Yet, believers struggle with saying no to some gifts that a child may want, though those gifts contain sexually explicit conduct, innuendos, or other “parts” that are on the path. The question to ask is: Does anything about this gift minimize the power and necessity of purity or the dangers and seduction of sexual impurity and lust?

The Gift Fosters a Stewardship of Time and/or Work, Rather than Laziness

Principle Six: The gift fosters a stew­ardship of time and/or work, rather than laziness (Proverbs 6:6-11; 10:26; 12:11, 24; 15:19; 19:15; 20:4; 24:30-34; 26:14-16). The transition over the past hundred years from farms to cities, from walking to driving, and from activity to inactivity makes this goal that much more important. Solomon’s concern is that the lazy person ruins his life. Therefore, in spite of the natu­ral, cultural flow toward inactivity, the wise gift-giver will consider how his gift will encourage or discourage laziness. The question to ask is: In what ways does this gift spur activity, encourage movement, or promote action rather than making the road smooth toward laziness?

The Gift Builds Gratitude, Discipline, and Service to Others Rather than Self-Centered Pleasure

Principle Seven: The gift builds grati­tude, discipline, and service to oth­ers rather than self-centered plea­sure (Proverbs 16:8, 16; 17:1; 21:17; 27:20; 28:16, 27; 29:7; 30:7-9). Every person’s sin nature naturally promotes and accentuates self-centeredness. Solomon is concerned that the wise person learn gratitude (being thank­ful for what God has given and others have supplied), be disciplined (learn­ing to say no to the self-indulgence of the flesh, temperance), and live a life of service to others. The question to ask is: Does this gift promote a grow­ing engagement with others, a diligent lifestyle, a sacrificial service to others? Or does this gift in fact minimize those same things?

The Gift Fulfills a Purpose or Fits a Real Need Rather than What Others Have or Is Most Popular

Principle Eight: The gift fulfills a purpose or fits a real need rather than what others have or is most popular (Proverbs 14:21, 22, 31; 23:17; 24:19-20; 28:16, 21; 29:25). It is so easy to choose to give “what another person has,” rather than what is needed. With children who are in school, it is easy for parents to want their kids to keep up with the other kids in the class. We often want to compare piles of stuff to see who comes out the best and biggest. However, Solomon warns against these temptations and suggests that the wise gift-giver considers what is best for the person receiving the gift, based on need, rather than what the neighbor has or might think. Furthermore, a concern for the poor and underprivi­leged should tend to temper what is desired or even provided. The question to ask is: In what ways does this gift fulfill legitimate need? Or is this gift just a “want” because someone else has it or it is most popular?

Enjoy shopping your Christmas list

Understand that any single gift will not take in all the principles at once. Sometimes a certain principle may not apply. That does not mean it is a bad gift. The point is, think about what the gift says about you and the recipient.

Christmas shopping does not have to be an overwhelm­ing task. In fact, this Christmas, as you apply biblical principles, you may find it more enjoyable to give than to receive since you will be giving with a clear purpose and defined goals. With a careful eye to your own heart and with wisdom principles in hand, go enjoy the meditation of the Scripture, the conver­sations with family, and shopping. (By the way, I hope that was not you in the red minivan at 5:00 a.m. at the mall the day after Thanksgiving — if it was, please forgive me.)

8 Principles for Wise Gift-Giving for Everyone on Your List

Principle One: The gift encourages growth — including spiritual growth, wisdom, intellect, and emotion

Principle Two: The gift exalts godly values

Principle Three: The gift promotes Bible memory and application

Principle Four: The gift engen­ders time with parents and other godly people

Principle Five: The gift reinforces sexual morality (Proverbs 5:1-20; 6:20-35; 7:6-27).

Principle Six: The gift fosters a stew­ardship of time and/or work, rather than laziness

Principle Seven: The gift builds grati­tude, discipline, and service to oth­ers rather than self-centered plea­sure

Principle Eight: The gift fulfills a purpose or fits a real need rather than what others have or is most popular

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